Christmas in July and Big Sister Evangeline

 As Evangeline’s shirt implies, she will soon be a big sister! Mimi and I are expecting a new baby around July 25^th (Christmas in July, as Mimi is fond of saying). Mimi thinks it’s a boy, I think it’s a girl.

It sure would be easier on me if it was a girl. I already know all the names of the Disney princesses, how to (kinda) match girl clothes and have gathered the importance of chocolate in coaxing even a toddler female. With a boy I would need to prepare myself for that whole locking horns thing you see on Bambi, start watching NASCAR and develop a healthy appreciation (if there is such a thing) of monster trucks.

But whatever you are, baby P-nut, you are ready for a ride. I’ve decided to write a short guide to prepare you for what’s in store in the Perreault house.

(1) Your house will never be clean—Nope, it’ll be an absolute mess. It’s not just that your Dad and Mom are busy people but that your big sister is certifiably destructive. If you want the house clean, most likely you’ll have to clean it. Be prepared to step on downed LEGO towers, and petrified Cheerios. This state of affairs is also probably a result of #2.

(2) The Perreaults never stop moving—And I mean that in the most literal way possible. We wake up, we work all day, we play hard. And by play hard, it should be clear that your Dad runs marathons and your sister pretty much does the same (measured in circles run around our kitchen table).

Sleeping doesn’t necessarily stop us. Your Dad doesn’t always sleep (not healthy) and your sister….Well, lets put it this way. I tucked your sister to bed two nights ago and then in the morning when I went to wake her up I found the furniture in the room had been rearranged and she was sleeping naked under her desk. ???

(3) You will be inundated with books—You’d better like books because they’ll be coming down around your ears. I don’t even know how many bookshelves we have at our house—in part because we’ve begun using furniture not meant for books, for books anyway. Want to read some Gramsci? On it. Prefer less Marxist, more contemplative. Dostoevsky on the way. Remembered that you’re a baby? Oh yeah, that. We’ve more Sandra Boynton, Dr. Seuss and Llama Llama than you can shake a stick at.

Also, we have reading time every night. You’ll be expected to chill-the-heck-out for the short period of time in which this occurs. This will include chapter books like Anne of Green Gables, Wizard of Oz and Peter Pan & Wendy.

Also we get three newspapers. Three. Breakfast time with newspapers is sacred. Trod carefully when you want to do puzzles or dance to the Belly Button song during breakfast.

(4) Hope you like school—That’s pretty much all we do is school and we love it. We’ll expect you to love it to or we’ll think you’re weird. Your Mom and Dad both are academics and spend an awful lot of time thinking about big ideas and figuring out how to communicate those to students. So no, we will not let you be that kid in class staring at your (crotch) smartphone while the professor is lecturing.

(5) Did we mention breakfast is sacred? We also make awesome breakfast. In recent years, I’ve been in charge of egg tacos and your Mom has been in charge of pancakes. They each happen about once a week. Are you excited? You should be.

(6) Your sister loves you—This mostly likely will be expressed in early years by drawing a Hitler mustache in marker on your face, dressing you like a princess or grabbing you by the hand and forcibly maneuvering you toward whatever activity she thinks you should do.

You Mom and I have been talking about you with Evangeline. We point to your Mom’s belly and say, “This is your baby brother/sister.” Evangeline is pretty indignant and points to her own belly saying, “No, my baby brother/sister right here.” As you can see, she’s more than willing to carry you herself.

(7) You will have killer clothes—Let me just do some math for you. You have three aunts. Three (Edgerly, Sarah and Catelyn). They’re all beautiful and they know how to make you beautiful (or handsome). Also you have three (four kinda) grandmothers and a grand-nana. They all will ensure that you are just killing it for pictures. Not to mention a stylish momma.

(8) Yes, your stuffed animals do talk—Don’t be ridiculous. Just because you hear a strange voice and my mouth is moving doesn’t mean I’m making the sounds. It’s totally coming from your stuffed animal. Also, your stuffed animals have attitude and typically take your parents side in any dispute. It’s just a coincidence.

(9) There will be a lot of music in your life—Notice I didn’t say “good” music. We all sing a lot. What we lack in talent, we make up for with enthusiasm. You should see me do air guitar while singing Bob Seger. Scratch that. You will. So just wait for it expectantly. Also we sometimes do awkward, very white, three-person dances. These are occasionally followed by piggyback rides. 

(10)               We love you—We’re not perfect, God knows. You could have won the lottery and ended up as the child of some rich, recently retired Silicon Valley tycoon but nope you’re with us. What we lack in funds and societal sex appeal, I think we make up in compassion and care for each other. You are coming into a loving house. We can’t wait to meet you.  

The Semester's End

Today is the first Sunday in more than 20 weeks I have not had to prepare for class. Greg is also wrapping up. He has a paper due and just finished all his grading.

For those who have asked how we do it, two words--love and perseverance. I could not do this without the love of my Lord, Greg, Evangeline, my parents, sisters, advisers and friends. You all supported me so much this semester. You and many others have given me the perseverance to stick with it when things get tough. Thank you for that.

That said I've learned a lot and plan to reflect on it a little later over break in another post. I'm so grateful for all the support people have given us, and all the encouragement people have sent our way (especially those within Greg and my cohorts and the faculty and staff of the graduate program).

Evangeline is one!

Congrats to Evangeline on one year. Mom and dad love you more thank you will ever know.

Eight Great Months of Evangeline

Yesterday Evangeline turned eight months old. This past month was really exciting with a trip to the zoo, a lot of walks, her baptism and first Vacation Bible School, adventures with mommy and daddy, playdates with Arlen, Penny, Claire and James.

My favorite Evangeline face. She now has enough hair to put a clip in.

 She is going through a little separation anxiety and teething which means she is fussy a lot. I just try remember that things will be a lot worse when she is 13--and tell myself to be patient.

She says dadaddada, and mamamama. She also will wave and says something that resembles like "hi" or "bye." She still loves books, and the library--chewing on them, turning their pages and listening to mommy and daddy read (even if it is only a few pages of a book).

Shot of Evan and Mommy. She's been a little clingy this month.

She loves music and even attacks Greg's guitars. She loves when Greg plays music for her on the piano or guitar. Greg and Evan also play the piano together sometimes.

She loves the church nursery especially the "big kid" toys like the Cozy coup car. However, her favorite toys are my flip flops and the dog water bowl.

And yes, she already learned to drive...

She loves people, and thrives in social places like church and the library. She smiles at strangers, dogs, kids, and gets upset when they will not give her their attention. She tries to talk with whomever she hears talk. We're in for some challenges. 

Wylie is still not a fan of her, but she's getting faster and is fascinated by him. She'll catch him someday soon. We were worried about that, but she stole his toy the other day--Wylie only grunted in annoyance and left.

It is hard to get her to stay still. She is toddling around (holding onto things) and constantly bobbing her head back and forth to rhythms or music.

Evangeline also learned to standup alone unsupported (for a minute) and recently (the scariest new accomplishment) climb stairs. She loves to dance to music.

She still does not like baby food. Her favorite foods are zucchini bread, animal crackers and pork chops.

Despite all the challenges, we cannot imagine life without her. She is growing and learning so much and we look forward to what each day will bring for her.

Four Months

Evangeline is four months old (okay a little older at this point). She is thriving in every since of the word. She is 15 lbs 13 ounces, 26 inches long and in the 90th percentile for height.

Greg and I are really enjoying spending time with her, although we have a lot going on personally with work and school. Evangeline is learning to crawl, she also loves her jump-and-play swing, and her bath toys. She is very attentive and has some great facial expressions. Below are some photos of her last month.

Hanging with Grandpa Jack

 

 

Valentine's Day party with baby friends Issac, Penny and Claire

In my cute Valentine's Day PJs from Grandpa Jack and G'Ma Rachel

McCalisters with Mommy

This month was full of firsts including her first trip to the pool and first Valentine's day. Her Grandpa Jack and G'ma Rachel visited at the end of January, her Wiggins Grandparents visited the week after Valentine's day.

Granddad Willie let me track the cars in front of the house

Grandma Carri plays with Evangeline

Aren't I the cutest little angel, all dressed up to go to a birthday party for Mrs. Julie

We also took a trip to Chicago to see the Perreaults two weeks ago. Evangeline got to meet her second cousins and great aunts and uncles. It was well worth the seven hour drive to see them.

Grand Taunte Jeanne

Cousins Ava and Leon Perreault

Grand Tante Angie

She just had a visit from her Aunt Sarah. Evan showed off her pool skills and her rolling abilities during Aunt Sarah's visit, not to mention her kooky personality.

Aunt Sarah and Evan at Shakespeare's Pizza

Evangeline has a steady group of baby friends now and hosted her first party for Valentine's day. She also enjoys her weekly play date with her friend Claire.

Claire is teaching Evan the importance of sitting up, but Evan has not quite grasped it.

Two Months

 

Trying out Sophie

She loves Christmas Trees, they lull her to sleep

I love this face, but who wouldn't

With her BFF James

Hobby Horse from Nana (a day coming soon that I will not have to hold her on the horse).

Just a few photos from the past month. We have been really bad about blogging, but Christmas was very busy. Evangeline is now two and a half months old. She is right on schedule development wise (or so the Parents as Teachers instructor said today.) She can hold her head up at 90 degrees, bat at things and is trying to grab things. She loves to look at photos of other babies and herself in the mirror. She weighs 13 pounds and 3 ounces and is wearing size 3 to 6 month clothing. She's about 25 inches long. I am so surprised how fast she is growing up. She smiles, coos and says "ah-rah" a lot. She loves animals with big eyes, and really loved Christmas trees during the Christmas season. I don't know what she'll do when we take ours down this weekend.

I love my little girl and I am so glad to have her as we go into 2012. She was the best Christmas gift I could have ever received.  I know I've said this before, but Greg and I are so lucky to have such awesome family and friends to support us this year. Evangeline does not know yet how much people love her, but I hope she figures it out.

In other news, today she got her first round of shots. She cried but I cried harder. She's been sore since we got home. She was brave.

One of my New Year's resolutions is to do better on this blog. I'd also like to get back to the weight I was at my wedding in 2006 so I can wear all the clothes I have not worn in awhile. I'd love to be a great professor when I start teaching on January 17, and I would like to get better at managing finances.

Three Weeks and Thriving

Evangeline had a great third week. It was marked by sleeping six hours most nights and rolling over (see the video below).

She loves story time with daddy which consists of the books Goodnight Moon and Daddy Kisses most nights. She still hates bathtime and getting her diaper changed (what baby does not).

This week Auntie Edge visited and made Evan two super cute hats. She also brought Evan her own Moosler stuffed animal. She and her boyfriend Chad also made Evan a toy box for her toys when she gets older.

At her two week pediatric appointment Friday Evan weighed 8 lbs and 7 oz. She is now almost 22 inches long (one more inch since the hospital). She is tracking things great and loves contrasting colors. Especially stripes and "happy round objects" like the eyes on her owl toy and the round yellow snail on her vibro chair.

We took our first trips out in public this week. We went to Orange Leaf twice, Sophia's for Auntie Edge's birthday, Babbo's Spaghetti House, downtown Columbia's shops (pictured above), church and Target. Next week family come to town on Wednesday for Thanksgiving! We are so blessed to have my parents, sisters, our friend Mike from Washington, DC and Greg's aunt, uncle and cousin joining us. We'll be sure to share photos.

Sorry this is so short but Mama has a lot going on this week. Good news is I will be teaching at Mizzou in the spring. I'm also working on Ph D applications and taking the GRE the week of Thanksgiving.

One more thing: some people wanted to know why we have password protected our blog. We just feel that Evangeline deserves a little privacy and as university professors we need to secure this site to provide her with that. That said, we would love to share this with friends and family so if you know someone who wants to read the blog just shoot us an email at theperreaultfamily@gmail.com and we'll grant them permission to read our posts.

In the beginning...

Here's a few photos from the hospital and Evan's Birth : )

Super hero daddy and Evan at an two hours old.

Getting footprints done. Granddad holding Evan's hand.

Post womb bath.

All clean and ready to go.

Evan and Mommy in the recovery room.

All wrapped up like a package from heaven.

Week one of Evangeline (or as I am calling her Evan)'s life was pretty normal for a baby. It consisted of a lot of eating, sleeping, crying and changing clothing and diapers. Greg is still planning on posting something about why we chose her name, but he is really busy catching up on school and work from the week he took off.

Mom, Dad and Evan in front of the Women and Children's Hospital on Thursday

Coming home from the hospital was hard, but with my parents in town it was a lot easier than it could have been.

Home in my bouncy chair.

We came home Thursday. It was hard not having all the nurses and hospital staff to remind me of feedings and checking the color of Evan's diapers. It was also hard to keep track of my own pain medication. Several things about the hospital reminded me of a spa. I got a sinus massage one night and the hospital even hosted a congratulatory meal for us our last night there.
Evan went to her first pediatric appointment on Friday. She had gained 6 ounces since leaving the hospital. The doctor also said she was developing very quickly. He commented on how good her head control was. Evan even made a dirty diaper for the doctor.

All dressed and ready to go home.

During the week she spent a lot of time with her Grandad (my dad) and Grandma (my mom). Spoke to all three of her aunts, Nana, Grand-nana, great aunts, second cousins, friends, Greg's former students from the Washington Journalism Center and many others on Skype.

My dad and Greg managed to get the radiator for the Mustang dropped off and fixed, but mainly we just played with Evan and got settled back at home.

We had great friends provide meals for us beginning on Thursday and continuing for the next week and a half. Flower and gifts arriving daily. Neighbors stopping by to say hi and ask if there was anything we needed.

Granddad and Grandma and Evan

Birth Class Buddies, James and Evan

My dad went home Sunday. And our friends Brenda and Kyle and their baby James, who was born the Friday before Evan, came over. Brenda and I met in birth class and were walking buddies during our third trimesters. It was so special to finally lay our babies side by side.


Greg went back to school and work on Monday.
Mom and I went to the grocery store on Tuesday (my first trip out of the house since the pediatrician), she had been to the grocery store earlier in the week and spoke with a large number of the staff there so several of them congratulated me on Evan's birth.

Evan and her Grandma

Mom hung out a few extra days and went home Tuesday. It was so helpful to have her around. I'm grateful that she cleaned house and helped me keep sane in the first few days home from the hospital.

A Week Over Due Makes You Strong

Committing to natural birth is hard when you are a week overdue.  But we have to stand strong because we love her enough to give her that opportunity.

I really want to wait as long as possible for any interventions into Miss P's birth. It was hard, but today I expressed this to my doctor, who said she was on board for waiting another week. This was an improvement from last week when she said she rarely waits more than a week past the due date to induce.

People have asked me if I am miserable. At first I was really mentally bogged down about her not coming early, or on time. But I'm at peace with waiting now.

I'm feeling great. I've been walking at least a mile a day--most days three or four miles. This weekend that walking added up to close to 20 miles with one long stent with my friend Brenda walking around my neighborhood for almost four hours. We walked to garage sales, the library, the school where Brenda works. Then we walked around a park in her neighborhood the next day.

That said its really hard when you were prepared so far in advance and you are still waiting. I want every pain I feel to be a contraction. I wish my little girl was here already. He closet is full of clothes. The weather is turning colder, I had to take out the few cold weather maternity clothing I have today as the temp is supposed to drop below freezing tonight. People keep asking why she is not here yet.

Honestly I do not know, it's like asking when Jesus is coming back again.

The good news is she is healthy and I am healthy. And there is the constant reminder: babies are not like cartons of milk they do not expire.

That said....
We'll officially go one week past our due date tomorrow. Right now we have one more week till scheduled induction date of October 25th. I can change my mind if I still need more time, but after that, the doctor said she would be really concerned for the baby's health (and my sanity).
No one ever talks about what happens to your morale when you are two weeks late (most babies don't last that long).

I know you are all as anxious as Greg and I are. You want to see what she looks like, know her name, see what she does.... However, Miss P is still taking her sweet time, and that is fine. I need to learn patience. I'm learning that babies come when God wants them to. This is only the beginning. Parenting takes patience and conviction. That said Greg and I still need your support.

Please pray for a safe delivery whenever she comes if that is tomorrow or Tuesday night.
We'll be having an ultra-sound on Friday to confirm that she's still doing ok living in my belly (if she has not arrived yet). I'm hoping we don't have to go and that she comes before then : )
Thanks for all your encouragement.

Our predictions....

Due date: October 12, 2011
Birthday date: October 7, 2011

Hair color:
Greg: dark brown and wavy, Mimi: dark brown and curly

Eye color:
Greg: Green, Mimi: Hazel

Other traits:
Greg: Mimi's Smile and skin tone, Mimi: Greg's nose and ears

Weight at birth:
Greg: 7 lbs even, Mimi: 7 lbs. 3 oz.

Height:
Greg: 20.5 inches, Mimi: 20 inches

Favorite color:
Greg: Green, Mimi: Orange

Other traits:
Greg says she will have big feet...like her mommy.

Mimi says she will love stories and music like her daddy. She already appears to love drums! Greg says she will love chocolate and dressing up like her mommy.

A Letter to My Daughter

To my daughter,



You're not born yet, but you are very real to your mother and I. We just left Washington DC and all the people we love to bet on a better future for you in Missouri. It's a long drive from Washington DC to Missouri. And U-Hauls don't have very good radios.

So I've been thinking about you a lot. This letter is for you on that day when you have nothing better to do that scour your decaying parent’s files. I hope you'll keep this just between the two of us and the global community.

Even though you're not here yet, I love you already. I would like to let you know how much I love you. If you don't know from how much I love you from when I tell you so (and I'll tell you everyday), I want to let you know the many ways I'll be showing my love to you:

1. When I read to you- Its not just because I like reading and I want you to too. People who read for fun are more successful. In any field. It's statistical fact.  The great thing about reading is you may just learn something. Even about yourself.



2. When I go to your ballet recital/aerobics competition/cheer-leading competition- Believe it or not, I don't go to these things for fun. No, right now, in July 2011, your mother and I don't say "hey let's do something fun--like go to a ballet recital for pre-Kers!" But I will go and more than that, I will enjoy it because I will be there for you. It really is more fun to do things for and with other people than to just to look out for yourself.


3. When a boy breaks your heart for the first time and you cry while I calmly explain that all men are assholes- I’ll tell you that you are too good for them and it’ll be true. I can guarantee it.

4. When I don't let you watch the movie with the guy in the mask, chainsaws and gratuitous violence- Sleep is important stuff. Get some, you'll see what I mean. Also, there's no shortage of horrors in our own world. Read the newspaper instead, I promise it's scarier, but you'll be able to sleep at night.

5. When I tell you to listen to your mother- the thing you need to know about your mother is that she is almost always right. And when she's not right, she closer to being right than you want to think. She has taught me so much and I've only had a little over seven years of her in my life (there was a lot that needed to be taught. See #3). You've got her forever! Learn from her. You'll be better for it.


6. When I explain to you that reading the entertainment section of the newspaper first is like having dessert for breakfast- No, no, no. You start with the front page, follow any jumps you like and then hit the editorial pages. But don’t spend too much time there. The writers in editorial get more insipid by the day. You have to work up to the reward of the entertainment section.

7. When I explain to you that if you find yourself voting for a single party down the line, you’re probably not reading enough- Or if you’re reading enough, you’re not reading enough from different people. Or you’re not thinking about what you’re reading. Our world is increasingly complex and odds are it’ll be more complex by the time you’re old enough to read this. Make it your goal to listen and understand people who are very different from you.

8. When I tell you to go put more clothes on- your mother will be able to explain this better than I can but the gist is that there are girls who make themselves look good by wearing less fabric and girls who make themselves look good by wearing more fabric. Wear more fabric. People will accuse you of class. Also, you’ll end up running into less of the creepy guys without checking accounts who want give you a ride on their motorcycle (more on this when you’re older).

9. When I don’t throw you out a window after you’ve left all your girly stuff everywhere- yeah, I know what’s coming. Makeup powder all over my bathroom sink, nail polish bottles on the living room coffee table, sparkle eye shadow on the bathroom floor (a fortuitous location if my heels wanted to sparkle). I suspect this because of the phenomenon I like to call “Mimi-sprawl” –when you’re mother makes a home somewhere it slowly begins to ebb out, taking over everything in it’s path like a German blitzkrieg. By the way, it’s rude to leave your stuff out. But you’ll see me show extraordinary patience.

10. When I make you come to Church with us, even though you’d rather sleep in and listen to music produced by a teenage guy with a too-perfect skin and lyrics about how no girls like him- I think being part of a community of faith is important--even if you take the religious part out. There are not a whole lot of atheist or generically “spiritual” groups who donate a lot of money when disasters strike.

11. When I make you be nice to family even though you want to throttle them- You don’t always have to like your family, but you do have to love them. The main problem with family is they know who you really are. That can be as unbearable as you make it.

12. When I don’t laugh in your face when you try to change your name in middle school- it won’t work. People will continue to call you by your real name. But that will be when you’re trying to assert your own identity. What you’ll later discover is that your entire life before middle school was a pretty big part of your identity.

13. When I don’t let you litter even though the cool girls at school do it- those cool girls are actually tools, but I’ll explain that to you at the time. We don’t have other planets to use. I’ve done my part to take care of this one, so you should to.

14. When I don’t give you want you want- The great thing about not getting our every want is that it helps us focus on what we really need. And whoever said it was good to get what we want?

15. When I insert your name into lyrics of timeless songs, ruining them for you forever- I already do this for Mimi and even for the dog. Sometimes I narrate their lives in the songs. You’ll think it’s ridiculous for at least part of your life (perhaps most). We only live once. Might as well sing while we’re here.

16. When I inform you that Superman is the greatest of all superheroes. It's true and here's why. Every other superhero has to put on a costume to become super. But Clark Kent IS the costume. He takes off his costume to become Superman. It really is what's on the inside that matters most.

17. When I tell you to reward yourself everyday- Now don't go crazy on this one, but you know what I mean. You see a bowl of M&Ms and know it’s not exactly the world’s most nutritious snack, but eat one or two anyway. It’s Thursday, the week is dragging, you’ve had your cup of coffee but are still on fumes—let yourself have a second cup. It’s a busy day and you’re racing across town—let yourself slow down enough to admire the flowers, the trees, the world around you.

I can’t wait to meet you! You can’t know how much I anticipate the day when I get to look in your eyes, rub your nose and bounce you on my knee! I never knew it was possible to love someone you’ve never met, but I love you even with you as a blank slate preparing to enter this world. There’s so much I want to show you!

Your dad,

G

Thinking of Baby

Today our baby is an inch and a half in length and weighs close to 5 ounces. It is hard to believe that is just six months it will be around 7 pounds. In 20 or so years he or she will be the same size as me.
This weekend was wonderful with people constantly congratulating Greg and I on our expectation. It does not seem too real just yet, but I have two appointments in the next couple of weeks that will make it even more real.
I'm starting to change my perspective on life to one that thinks about my baby. Right now this means thinking about purchases, what I eat, and the activities I do and how they will affect my baby's health and future. So much to think about, and so little time. Although there are so many questions in my life right now I know one thing for sure...
Baby I love you. I cannot wait to meet you.

The photo is of a gift from Lauren Goldsberry: Giraffe, card and some magazines for expectant moms.